Vuvuzelas ...who's responsible?

Thank you to Paul Johnson whom, from the opening comments of his email about who is most likely to win the Braggers' League, I presume is a Villa fan, or perhaps a very discerning neutral. Paul has raised a question concerning the very important issue of vuvuzela playing. Clearly an issue that could influence the outcome of matches, especially if a chorus is blown as a player steps up to take a penalty, etc.

Paul comments:

"With regard to "Any significant display of vuvuzela playing by fans at any local derby will be docked a point" - would this mean that the home team or the team with the vuvuzela playing fans (or even both teams) would be docked a point? The home team are at fault for allowing the vuvuzelas into the ground as much as the supporters for "playing" (sic) them."

Thanks for this Paul, I have telephoned the committee over at the Ricoh, who were able to deliberate the matter for a few moments while the Hammond Organ was being brought on stage between Ghost Town and The Liquidator. The committee thank you for bringing this to their attention and they suggest that a point be docked for the actual 'significant' playing (and share your sic), two points docked to the home team's stewards for allowing the vuvuzelas into the ground in the first place and an additional point docked if a steward is actually photographed blowing a vuvuzela him or herself.

As we speak, stewards around the West Midlands are being trained in the

best way to deal with vuvuzelas - a portable vice helps

On a different issue, Paul has also suggested that bonus Bragger Points be awarded to teams on a sympathy basis for spending time in the relegation zone:

"Given that spending time in the "relegation zone" can be stressful for fans I would like to suggest that somehow time in the relegation zone is compensated with BPs. Along the lines of 1 point for each 4 consecutive weeks spent in the bottom three. Once a point has been achieved by a team then they would have to spend another 4 consecutive weeks in the bottom three for a second point and so on giving a possible 9 BPs for 36 consecutive weeks in the relegation zone. If a team (we all know we mean the Albion) spend a whole season in the bottom 3 then surely they deserve the BPs."

Whilst we can see where you're coming from here Paul and appreciate your public spirited gesture, and there's no denying that a long-term future of perpetually bouncing up and down must get disheartening at some point, I'm just worried about awarding points on the basis of being, well ok, crap basically. It's like dealing with children Paul, we don't reward lazy work and lack of commitment.

The problem is that one of our teams could beat Man U twice in the season and earn only 6 BP points, whereas another team (and it's slightly unfair to name Albion as it could be any one of .... well 2 teams) could spend the entire season at the foot of the league and earn 9 points.

However, I think the committee are willing to compromise because the point you make is a good one and this league is after all about supporting our local teams over the likes of Chelsea, Man U, Man City and Arsenal. So what about awarding the points as you suggest but deducting the lot if the team is ultimately relegated? That way we can show them (whoever they may be) empathy throughout the season whilst allowing the rest of us that final joyous gesture of rubbing salt into the wounds on the last day of the season.

Sympathy points for having Boyden as a fan?